How To Say Welcome, How To Be Appreciated
Chapter 10: In work,
you need to be careful step by step
Lesson 1: Definitely don’t pretend to be smarter than the leader
A recent university graduate applied for a job
as a secretary for the general manager of a company.
She is young,
beautiful,
innocent and full of compassion.
On Children’s Day,
the company encourages employees to donate to children
who cannot go to school;
As the daughter of a teacher,
she deeply sympathizes
with children in difficult circumstances.
When she was in college,
she regularly donated her small allowance
and living expenses for later activities.
After working,
she had saved money,
so she thought that it was her responsibility to support children
who could not go to school,
so she did not hesitate to support ten million,
second only to the general director,
several deputy generals
and the person in charge of the department.
Because of this,
the company also praised her.
Not long after that,
during the earthquake
and flood in the Central region,
she witnessed the sufferings of people in the disaster area,
and without hesitation donated twenty million,
standing in the “red board” hanging
in front of the big door.
The company’s lobby,
her name is even above the CEO,
and the most common employees are only a few hundred thousand.
To the extent that other department leaders also inquired about her,
she also felt a sense of pride.
But,
in the company meeting,
after the general manager enthusiastically praised her,
the other deputy directors showed a cold attitude,
even one vice president said,
in the future,
everyone must do similar activities.
If you know your own strength,
you can’t contribute so much
because you want to stand out.
After this,
the general manager was also not as enthusiastic about her as before,
because of that,
she cried a lot.
At work,
we must know how to treat people,
definitely not “overcome”
but pay attention to save face for superior leaders.
At work,
a lot of people don’t pay attention to this point,
especially with some details outside of work.
That will certainly cause the opposition of the leader,
making his work fall into a passive position.
For example,
there are people with similar interests
and interests in leadership,
but they do not think that
their interest in hobbies and their relationship
with the leader has any particularly important relationship,
so time outside of work is not important,
know how to respect big and small,
high and low, neglect to respect the opinion of the leader.
These things may seem very small,
but in the eyes of the leader,
they become a big deal,
you challenge the authority of the leader,
will surely plant the seeds of “hate” in their hearts,
so at some point they may will cause trouble for you.
Law of social role switching (Role Switching):
In society,
each person has a different role,
what we need to do is to perform our role well,
not play the role of others.
This is extremely important for office workers,
which can help avoid situations that exceed their duties
and bring disaster to themselves.
In a meeting,
Mr. Dung presented a completely new sales plan,
which quickly received the confirmation of the general director.
Because of this,
Dung is extremely wise,
often saying in front of others:
“See,
my plan has been accepted by the general manager,
but the manager said that
I was thinking in vain.”
Dung considers himself smarter than his manager,
always bragging in front of others.
That made the manager very unhappy after knowing the matter,
but it did not make it difficult for Dung.
When this manager was reassigned,
the company asked him to introduce a new manager.
This manager thought that
Dung always thought
that he was smarter than himself,
causing himself to lose face many times,
so he did not introduce Dung.
The manager wrote in the comments section as follows:
Dung is too boastful,
doesn’t take anyone seriously,
it is easy to bring disaster to the company.
Poor Dung, because of his dignity,
lost a promotion opportunity.
Many people think that
they are excellent at work
but do not know
why suddenly their superiors are cold to them.
That’s because your own unintentional words
or actions mislead the leader.
No resentment is without reason,
and there is no love that is without reason,
the reason why some people at work,
despite their outstanding ability,
are not promoted,
the reason lies in them proved to be smarter than the leader,
committing great taboos at work.
In psychology,
there is a law that transforms social roles,
which is extremely important at work.
At work,
the new leader is the “general”
and the employee is just “good” anyway.
If “good” turns out to be smarter than “general”,
then “general” will definitely take out his anger on “good”,
even if it is something unrelated to work.
Therefore, in our work,
we must do well the role of “good”,
not compete as “general”.
No superior wants to see employees smarter than him,
like Cao Cao in the Three Kingdoms finding an excuse to kill Duong Tu.
At work,
we must be more careful,
not intrusive
authority of the leader,
not to appear smarter than the leader.
Working Manual
As an employee,
how should we avoid falling into the dilemma of “better than the boss”,
avoiding becoming a “thorn” in the eyes of our superiors?
(1) One step back, two steps forward
Whether at work or in life,
when communicating with leaders,
we must consider the leader as the leader,
think about ways to save face for the leader,
so that the leader thinks he is a talent,
not a man intent on threatening his position.
(2) Not to be superior to the leader
When communicating with leaders,
we must study the psychology of superiors.
In the face of glory,
we must treat it peacefully,
consider it as the wisdom
and support of the leader,
and the help of friends,
so that we can have success at work.
On the contrary,
if we offend the leader
because of our temporary superiority,
we will certainly cause great trouble to ourselves.
Smart people are
when they have glory,
they will absolutely not be stingy
with compliments to their superiors,
for them, complimenting their superiors is complimenting themselves.
Lesson 2: When a leader gets angry,
he refrains from staying for a long time
After Duy Hoang finished reporting the company’s product consumption
this season to the leader,
the leader was extremely angry,
banging the table loudly shouting:
“What is the sales department doing?
Sales are 20% less than last season.”
As the leader’s secretary,
Duy Hoang thinks it’s not good to be scolded and quietly leave.
But what surprised Duy Hoang was that
the leader had no intention of stopping,
he couldn’t go,
but he couldn’t stay.
The director saw Duy Hoang standing there,
immediately shouted:
“What are you still standing there for?
Find me a sales manager.
I don’t know what you guys do,
no creativity at all!”
Only then did Duy Hoang have the opportunity to go out.
Why was the innocent Duy Hoang scolded by the leader?
When leaders start to show discontent,
Duy Hoang should know what to avoid,
not to mention the data
in the report is enough
to make the leader become an “explosive warehouse”,
which can explode at any time.
When the leader sees the report,
there will definitely be a feeling of frustration,
this frustrating anxiety is easy to make people feel inhibited,
from which there is a situation of anger and cursing.
Duy Hoang is wrong in that
he does not know how to pay attention
to observe the leader’s face,
do not know the situation,
and when faced with a situation,
he does not avoid it but also actively accepts it,
so becoming the leader’s anger is natural.
In psychology,
there is a “kick the cat effect”,
indicating that people’s feelings of dissatisfaction
and bad moods are often transmitted in order of social rank,
from the oldest to the oldest.
In the above story,
after the leader saw the report,
the company’s performance was affected,
he would first reprimand the sales department,
after reprimanding all the relevant departments,
then he would look at Seeing Duy Hoang,
Duy Hoang became the victim for no reason.
Normally,
people’s emotions will be influenced
by the environment and some random causes,
from which emotional changes occur,
either for the better or for the worse.
After a person’s emotions get worse,
he will be subconsciously instigated
to choose a subordinate or someone
who cannot counterattack to vent his anger.
As a subordinate,
when seeing the leader’s mood is not good,
it is best to choose to avoid
or stay away from the leader,
to avoid becoming a barrel of anger for no reason.
In the morning,
Duy Hoang saw the director making a phone call,
walking into the office,
and heard from afar that
he seemed to be arguing something with the other end of the line.
Duy Hoang originally planned to take the afternoon off,
but after thinking for a while,
he gave up his idea.
Another colleague went to the director’s office
to report the debt of the previous month,
just or the director was angry
and could not find an object to vent,
so this colleague was scolded by the director
for a match before being allowed to leave. room.
When Duy Hoang and a few other colleagues saw it,
everyone looked at each other,
did not dare to speak loudly,
even walking on tiptoe,
afraid of being implicated.
When communicating with leaders,
observing facial expressions and words is indispensable.
Before speaking, before working,
you must definitely look at the leader’s face,
ask the leader’s secretary
and then go find the leader,
be sure,
definitely not rush in
when the leader is angry in heart.
Even if we have an urgent matter,
after reporting to the leader,
we should find an excuse to leave immediately,
do not wait for the leader to vent his anger.
Working Manual
As subordinates,
we cannot avoid having to communicate with leaders.
So, when leaders are angry,
what should we do?
(1) Don’t turn yourself into a “stomped cat”
No one wants to be someone else’s vent,
so when we see a leader getting angry,
we try to avoid asking the leader.
(2) When the leadership mood is not good,
know what to avoid
We must not wait until leader
couldn’t hold back the anger in his heart before he left.
If he wanted to go then he wouldn’t be able to.
Therefore,
when entering the door,
observe the leader’s face,
if the leader’s mood is not good,
then immediately ask for permission to leave.
Lesson 3: When reporting on work,
you need to pay attention to techniques
Nhat Minh entered the director’s room
to report the situation of the sales department.
Nhat Minh said:
“Dear Director,
thanks to your wise leadership,
this quarter’s sales increased
by 50% compared to the previous quarter.”
After hearing that,
the director’s face was beaming and full of praise:
“You guys did a good job,
I will think about increasing the bonus for you.”
Nhat Minh said:
“This quarter, the enthusiasm in the work
of the professional staff increased a lot,
even the laziest Huu Tien’s sales achievement increased by 30%.”
The director was even more excited
when he heard that:
“As I said,
professional staff just need to work hard,
they will definitely have achievements.
That’s right,
is there a lot of spending on inviting customers this quarter?”
Nhat Minh said:
More than the previous quarter,
but compared to the achievement,
it is not 30%.
Although the excess expenditure is increased,
in return for high sales performance, for the company,
it is a profit, not a loss.”
The director was not angry
because of the amount of money spent on customers,
but thought for a moment and then said:
“Just like that,
next quarter a little restraint,
try to minimize those expenses.”
Nhat Minh is the sales manager,
spending on entertaining customers increased
by nearly 30% compared to the previous quarter,
he was already prepared to be scolded,
but because of his sales record in front of him,
he avoided it to get the anger of the director.
Through this story,
we can understand that,
when reporting to the leader,
we must pay attention to techniques,
thus both helping ourselves to avoid danger
and showing our achievements.
If we report bad news first,
we will be scolded by the leader first,
and our achievements in the eyes of the leader
will also be greatly reduced.
Leaders also like employees to report a lot of good news,
limit bad news,
if you have to face employees with bad news every day,
no one will want to be a leader anymore.
Just like in life,
everyone likes to receive good news,
but no one wants to receive bad news.
This is the typical “praise effect” in psychology.
The “Carol effect” is that people like to hear
or say good news,
but don’t like to say or hear bad news.
In the ancient Roman Empire,
whoever brought bad news was bound to be put on the scaffold,
so the people below would hide the bad news
and not report it.
In the same way at work,
leaders at the top,
are used to employees reporting good news,
once there is an employee reporting bad news,
they will feel uncomfortable,
such employees will definitely not be respected.
This also explains that
Emperor Qianlong of the Qing Dynasty clearly knew that
He Than was corrupt and corrupt,
but why did not let him go to prison,
because Hoa Than was the one who always brought him joy.
However,
in the face of serious bad problems,
if we hide the problem and do not report it,
it will be easier to bring harm to the company,
sooner or later it will be discovered by the leadership,
so we should report it how?
That is when reporting,
let’s report more good news,
less bad news,
use good news to override bad news,
of course the leader will not pay attention to bad news,
so it will not lose our merit.
Nhat Minh is such a manager.
When reporting good information to the director,
he usually reports first,
and at the same time exaggerates a bit,
the director after hearing his face is bright,
he will pay more attention to Nhat Minh.
Of course,
Nhat Minh is also wise to report bad things at the right time,
because if you hide it,
it will be like bringing disaster to you later.
He skillfully delivers bad news.
He said:
“Director,
a plan that we designed the customer has already agreed,
two days will sign the payment contract.”
After listening to the director,
he immediately praised Nhat Minh
for a few sentences,
Nhat Minh was not proud of that,
and continued:
“There is bad information.”
The director said:
“It’s okay,
you say it”.
Nhat Minh said:
“Another customer is a bit dissatisfied with our plan,
asking for some small changes,
which may be a bit delayed.”
The director said:
“You also reported this small problem to me,
so why do I need a manager like you?
You see and solve it,
just convince the customer.”
Nhat Minh saw that the director was not angry,
so he happily went to correct the plan.
In fact,
this option the customer did not like,
asked to correct it,
Nhat Minh is the manager of the department,
so that if such a problem occurs,
of course,
he will be reprimanded.
But when he reported to the director,
he turned the big thing into a small one,
and thanks to that,
he gained more time and finally convinced the customer.
Working Manual
Telling good news does not tell bad news,
it is hiding the problem,
sooner or later it will be discovered;
If you send bad news
and don’t tell good news,
then it’s both work and unsatisfactory,
no one will want to do that.
The best method is to report a lot of good news
Don’t use bad news,
use good news to overcome bad news.
Therefore,
when reporting to the leader,
let’s try to think about the following points:
(1) There are two good pieces of information,
must divide the report
That way,
there will be two surprises,
thereby keeping the leader in a good mood,
and will also give himself two merits.
(2) One good news,
one bad news,
will be reported together
Using the enjoyment of good information
to ease the distress of bad news,
the “negative effect” is also greatly reduced.
(3) If there are two bad news,
report them together
If there’s two bad news,
it’s best to report it together,
so there’s less to worry about
than having the bad news be reported multiple times.
Lesson 4: Helping colleagues requires a degree
Anh Quan is an extremely enthusiastic person,
working as a department manager in a company.
Thanh Ngoc is a new colleague in the company.
Because Thanh Ngoc has just graduated,
Anh Quan guides
and teaches her everything in her work.
Thus, the time the two of them interacted
with each other quite a lot,
Quan is a righteous,
upright person,
if there is any awkward thing,
he would rather make it difficult for himself than
to make it difficult for others.
Many times,
other people have been out of work for a long time,
but because Thanh Ngoc has not finished her work,
she cannot return.
Anh Quan saw that and often stayed to help her.
Once, Thanh Ngoc cried and said to Anh Quan:
“Head of the department, it’s all
because I’m too stupid to get involved with you.”
Quan said:
“Don’t say that,
you also want to do a good job.”
But Thanh Ngoc still cried non-stop.
Quan asked:
“Do you have a problem?”
Thanh Ngoc choked and said:
“I’m a newbie,
I should have learned a little more profession.
But a friend of mine is sick
and needs to take care of her,
and work can’t be delayed,
so it’s very awkward.”
After listening,
Anh Quan said without hesitation:
“Let me handle it,
you go take care of you first.”
Because of this,
he often comes home very late.
His wife said angrily,
“I come home late every day,
I’d rather stay at the company.”
The “Hedgehog effect” originates from a western fable.
On a cold winter day,
two hedgehogs leaned close to each other to keep warm.
At first,
due to their close proximity,
both poked each other’s body leaving the other bloody,
later on,
they adjusted their posture,
keeping a certain distance,
so that they could not only achieve effective heating
but also protect the opponent.
As colleagues,
helping each other is of course a good thing,
this can also increase the friendship between the two parties.
But helping colleagues also needs to have a level,
not because of colleagues’ problems that affect their lives.
Quan in the story is such a person,
he looks like a really good person,
but he causes trouble for himself.
Thanh Ngoc’s friend in the story is not sick.
She just took advantage of Anh Quan’s love of helping others.
Obviously,
Anh Quan helps his colleagues,
but why did he become a tool for his colleagues to take advantage of?
Because he does not understand the level of communication between colleagues,
colleagues have difficulty in work,
he should help, but it is not a responsibility that
he is obligated to fulfill.
The “hedgehog effect” in psychology is saying that
people should keep an appropriate distance,
this distance makes people feel safe.
But Anh Quan ignored this effect,
helping his colleagues excessively,
so he accidentally fell into the trap of his colleagues.
At work,
between colleagues,
in addition to cooperation for mutual development,
there is also a competitive relationship.
It is a good thing for us to help our colleagues,
but we cannot simply pursue our personal good reputation,
but we must be careful not to let others take advantage.
Ha Anh and Quynh Luong came to the company
to work on the same day,
after three years,
their manager was promoted.
The two of them are considered veterans in the department,
both with the potential to become new managers.
Ha Anh is a carefree person
who basically doesn’t think about this. Recently,
Quynh Luong had a task to complete,
and immediately asked Ha Anh for help.
Ha Anh sacrificed her working time to help Quynh Luong
and had to work overtime to complete her duties.
The next day,
even though Ha Anh’s task was completed,
it was not good,
had to receive criticism from the manager,
and Quynh Luong, thanks to Ha Anh’s help,
the job was excellent.
Good rating by management.
Meanwhile,
the manager took the results of this task to evaluate
and compare between the two,
as a result,
Quynh Luong was made the manager of this department as expected.
Everyone has weaknesses,
only someone who secretly hides the inner weaknesses,
if you don’t delve into it,
it will be difficult to detect.
But some people’s weaknesses are clearly visible on the outside,
very easy to be discovered by others.
In fact,
this is a very dangerous expression,
especially in the fiercely competitive marketplace.
If once we were discovered by others,
our weakness
It will be easy for them to take advantage of you.
Ha Anh in the story is very clearly calculated by Quynh Luong,
but why is she so easily taken advantage of?
Because the relationship between her and Quynh Luong is too close,
Quynh Luong fully understands Ha Anh’s weaknesses.
Quynh Luong took advantage of Ha Anh’s cheerful personality
to help others,
rarely refusing Ha Anh to achieve her goals.
At work,
between co-workers,
apart from cooperation is competition,
many people like to take advantage of weaknesses
in other people’s personalities to achieve their goals.
That tells us that,
at work,
helping colleagues needs to have a degree,
communicating with colleagues must pay attention
to keep a certain distance,
this is also to help themselves be better protected.
It’s a moral that everyone should know.
Working Manual
Distance breeds safety,
but we cannot for the sake of protecting ourselves
It put our colleagues on the opposite side.
So, how do we stay relevant when helping our colleagues?
(1) Can be close but can’t be without distance
We want to work at the company for a long time,
of course we must have a good co-worker relationship,
so keeping a friendly relationship with colleagues is necessary.
But between colleagues,
there is also a competitive relationship
and a conflict of interest,
so when communicating with colleagues,
we must have a certain distance,
so that we can avoid colleagues fully grasping strengths and weaknesses.
even your privacy,
you will not become a tool to be taken advantage of.
(2) You can help colleagues,
but you must do your job well
Before we help our colleagues,
we must maintain our record.
We must rely on our achievements to prove our excellence,
not sacrifice ourselves to help our colleagues.
Lesson 5: Even if you have a different opinion,
don’t argue fiercely in front of everyone
Recently,
Mr. Liu’s mood has been quite upset,
the main reason is that during the company meeting,
his opinions
and the manager’s are different.
The manager thought that
Mr. Liu was deliberately causing trouble with him,
so the discussion
between two reached more and more climax,
eventually developing into a fierce argument,
everyone was not happy to leave.
The manager then made excuses for Mr. Liu to work hard.
In the monthly evaluation,
Mr. Liu was cut by a third of his bonus.
Colleagues around advised Mr. Luu to apologize to the manager,
consider this matter over,
pay more attention later,
consider it as spending money to buy experience.
But Mr. Liu didn’t think so,
he said:
“This is not because of the previous discussion,
but because he took public revenge for his own revenge.
I definitely have to tell my superiors about this.”
Why is Mr. Luu really not wrong?
Of course not.
Even if he has a different point of view,
he must not challenge the authority of the manager
in front of his colleagues,
let alone argue with the manager vehemently,
which will certainly cause dissatisfaction with the manager.
With the manager,
Mr. Luu is clearly making himself awkward.
If he doesn’t make amends,
will be difficult for him to lead this department in the future.
At work,
a lot of people do not understand
how to think about the psychology of the leader,
the leader says anyone with another opinion can raise it,
we immediately speak out our other thoughts,
so the leader found it very awkward.
Dealing with people is,
after all,
an art of grasping the psychology of others,
only grasping the psychology of others will not hurt their self-esteem
or self-esteem,
so we can can win people’s sympathy.
This is extremely important,
especially in the marketplace.
However,
there are always some people who like to confront the leader,
point out the leader’s mistakes in front of everyone,
make the leader awkward and lose face,
while the leader is not convenient to reveal
and blame the employees
This has left a bad impression on the leadership.
In the end,
this type of person will sooner
or later be kicked out
by the leader who makes excuses,
demotion or reassignment to another department,
or being fired.
In a meeting of the company,
after finishing the task of the next stage,
the director asked everyone if they had any ideas.
Duy Nghia saw the director directing his gaze towards him,
a straightforward,
quick-mouthed person like Duy Nghia immediately stood up
and said without thinking:
“I think …”
The director’s face became more and more difficult.
See, he asked:
“Do you think what you say is true?”
Duy Nghia said:
“I think so,
it will be better…”
After listening,
the director felt extremely awkward,
but could not criticize Duy Nghia.
So the director turned his eyes to Duc Kien
who is a seasoned person in the company,
Duc Kien interrupted Duy Nghia:
“The director’s view is clearly consistent
with the market situation,
I support the director. ”
After that,
everyone competed to support the director’s point of view,
in the end Duy Nghia was like a hero lonely,
standing in the middle of the meeting room.
The director looked at Duy Nghia standing there,
didn’t mind him,
but said seriously:
“If everyone supports my idea,
then I hope the work in the next stage,
everyone tries harder in the further
to enhance the company’s performance.”
Some time later,
Duy Nghia was fired
from his job by the director.
In psychology there is a “position effect”.
That is,
a leader with a high position,
the praise of the leader will be much;
In contrast,
low-status employees,
even the right employees’ opinions are not easily accepted by everyone.
As for most leaders,
in psychology,
they form a formula:
their words are authority,
the truth,
opposing them is wrong.
The “status effect” was put forward
by an American psychologist,
to refer to the ideas and measures that
people of high status offer that are easily recognized,
approved,
and implemented
by the majority of people with lower status presently;
and opinions and measures proposed by people of low status,
even though they are correct,
or similar to those of high status,
are not easily recognized,
approved,
and implemented by people,
that is,
“words of speech.” determined by people,
people take status as the priority”.
In work,
the leader will absolutely not allow out of tune sounds,
this is a challenge to the authority of the leader,
especially in front of everyone.
Therefore,
when we have a disagreement with the leader,
we must not argue with the leader in front of everyone,
and must maintain the authority
and dignity of the leader.
Especially in a large meeting,
it is not allowed to have a different opinion from the leader,
even if we have different views,
it is not necessary to point it out
in front of us should use flexible words,
suggestive rather than straight talk,
damaging the leader’s self-esteem,
challenging the leader’s authority.
Working Manual
When we have a disagreement with the leader,
how can we make the leader happy to accept our point of view
and not offend them?
(1) Protect the authority of the leader
The authority of the leader does not allow employees to infringe,
when we disagree with the leader,
we should try to avoid arguing with the leader,
but can suggest to the leader
or subtly give the opinion of the leader.
(2) Find a leader to talk privately
It is possible to personally meet the leader,
give his “incomplete opinion”,
ask the leader for guidance,
meet the staff who understand such things,
no leader is angry;
On the contrary,
the leader will feel very happy
because his employees know how to work
and will have the intention to promote.
This is much more effective than giving a different opinion in front of people,
and is also much more beneficial for myself.